I Am A Legend In My Own Mind.

I just bought my ticket for the midnight showing of Wolverine. This movie has been hyped up to the heavens. I think God will send His angels down to catch the flick. Like many X-Men fans and Wolverine fans, I am excited. Will the movie match the hype? That is the question that will be answered after the weekend. Critics will look at box office totals to measure the success of the movie. If the movie breaks records, then the movie had matched the expectations.  Kind of.

Lets go back to Star Wars and the Phantom Menace. It was big time hyped. Come on the now. The sure mention of the new Star Wars movie brought expectations like no other.  As usual people camped out in front of the theaters across America. I think that is still weird. That is just my humble opinion. Anyway, customers were line up to see the new Star Wars movie. After the weekend was over the movie had shattered box office records. Congratulations to George Lucas.  Still there were hard core fans that was not impress with the movie. In fact, they saw the movie again just to see if they had missed something.  The movie was not necessarily a critics success. Fans would admit there were flaws in the movie, and they hated one particular character.  They hated the character so much scripts were written by fans that had the character killed. Wow! That is hatred.  Still the movie made big bucks at the box office. George Lucas made more millions from his prize franchise.

Wolverine could possibly break box office records this week. I am thinking around eighty to ninety million. Perhaps, around one hundred million. Those would be outstanding figures that the studios would love for the movie to receive. The one thing though they really should want is praise. When fans praise a movie, something special happens. Wolverine will be catapulted to the likes of E.T.. Videos will be sold non stop. Merchandise will be available year round. Fan clubs will be establish with over thousands of geeky members.  This is the ultimate in movie God-like symbol. For decades people will talk about Wolverine. Their kids will know about Wolverine. Not just the character, but the awesome movie.  Yes, Wolverine will make good money. People will look at the money and say, “I think it matched the hype.” I would say lets read what the fans say. The fans will determine if the movie is just another block buster or a timeless classic.

The Dragon with No Fire

Fast and the Furious brought out the summer blockbuster. Fast cars, and faster women with some things blow up is the mark of summer movie magic. Now a movie a week later can erase the movie magic. More like show the movie customers that there are a such thing as a flop. What is a flop? Basically, a movie that falls short of explosions, women, and cars. Well, at least have great action sequence and interesting characters. Dragon Ball Evolution is that flop. Perfect for movie goers to avoid, critics to hiss, and for those that seen the movie to vomit. I know exactly what those people who are vomiting saying to themselves, “Hell has no fury for such crap.”
Lets break down the movie lack of magic. Again a movie must have interesting characters, and great action sequence. Eye candy is a plus, and eye candy with little clothing is even better. Dragon Ball does have some eye candy. I must say the eye candy are beautiful. Also able to kick you face and put on their make up at the same time. That takes talent. Most media has an abundance of eye candy. In fact, you can look up the eye candy on your computer. Don’t get gross or perverted. Unless you want to, but that is your choice.
Action is the other thing a movie must have. Dragon Ball fail flat. In fact, it is more interesting listening to people talk about how ’sucky’ the movie was. I even thought about playing popcorn catch with the kids below. That would be fun. Don’t get me wrong. There were a few good fight scenes. I love the fight between the two women. It was like seeing two girls at a high school going at it. It was a no hold bars, knock down fight, hair pulling, kick them in the soft spot. Other than that the fight scenes were soft. Some of them similar to the many other fight scenes in movies. The last battle was not spectacular. It is not even worthy to be mention in the many cool fight scenes in the cartoon the movie is based on. How disappointing.
The last is interesting characters. Goku was an compeling character in the cartoon series. In the movie he is a whiney version. More like the uncool version of the vampire teen love in Twilight. The rest of the characters are not even worth mentioning. Basically, you can cut off any character from any karate movie and you have the rest of the cast. Just remember not to leave out the love interest.
Now you have it. A movie flop. There was no fire to the movie. No hard punches to excite. No interesting characters to follow. Some eye candy, but you can save ten dollars. Just browse through the magazines at the bookstore. Go online and look at the gorgeous stars.

Here Comes the Blockbusters.

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How can you make a blockbuster movie? I did not say a great movie. Nor, did I say a movie that is worth mentioning of academy awards nomination. Just a movie that will make money. Is that what it is all about? Money! Money! Money! Here is the formula for a blockbuster movie that will make money. Bring in the hot chicks and hunky guys. You got to have that eye candy. Make sure things go boom and have some awesome chase scenes. Of course make sure the ending is somewhat happy. Simple and direct. That is the formula for the summer movies.
It is only spring but lets just say that the movie “Fast and Furious” is the beginning of the summer movies. It has hot guys for the ladies. Vin Diesel is something that the ladies drool over. I don’t know why. So what he has muscles. Also, Paul Walker with his blue eyes. Hey blue eyes are overrated. In fact, anything not brown is overrated. But that is just me. Now for the guys. The women and lots of them. Dress in the scandalous outfits. Showing off those pretty legs. Of course the women are so hot they have to kiss each other. Yeah, I guess that is a bonus for the guys. Of course the movie have a lot of action from beginning to end. Since the movie involves cars, there are a lot of car chases. I would say the car chases is so awesome.
The movie is not about great acting or a awesome plot. Simply booty and some action that will draw the crowds in. Fast and Furious delivers the goods. I recommend it for all those summer movie lovers. Those that love those Oscar  or Golden Globe type movies should just avoid this movie. You will find holes in it. You will start questioning certain scenes and say things like “that would not happen in real life.” Also you will  just be annoying to the main audience.  Always sapping the fun out of basic movie watching. We the audience don’t want to think. We want to look and go ‘ooh’ and ‘aw”.

Now everyone else go see the movie. Shut down your brains, buy your popcorn, and let the good times roll.